I
really felt called to write on this today. …It’s a tough day for me. I feel
weak, my spirit feels weak. I realize
the atmosphere I am in is so different than my norm. What I have been working on day-in and
day-out is also quite different than my standard days. Now, I have such a
purpose. But I began to feel the
pressure of it today. I began to feel how much I owe to God and to all the
people around the world. I owe Him my
mind, my body, and all my spirit. I don’t have time to be tired when I can be
educating myself academically, allowing me a better platform to spread His
word. I don’t have time to waste
minutely complaining about my annoyances—or even thinking about them for that
matter; when I have a Bible to get through and breakdown and people need to be
saved. My spirit is being strengthened
through every struggle. I am beginning
to see the difference between when the world breaks you down, in contrast to
when God does. God uses the world many times to strip us of what we deem as “sufficient”, by doing
exactly that, stripping different parts of the world from us which we have been
dependent upon so long. Whether that be of
sexual immorality, intoxicating the mind and body with too many negative
substances, maybe using food as an outlet for happiness, or our friends, or
entertainment, etc…You know the list goes on.
But when we strip ourselves of those things, we begin to be
sanctified. It’s a process, but nonetheless
over time finally making us whole.
Recently
(3 weeks ago) I packed up and left home; I went to a different state to
visit some of my brothers in the faith.
This trip was to merely fellowship and meet more of my brothers and
sisters in the faith, whom I had never even met before—a beautiful thing. …Little
did I know once I stepped foot on these grounds, I would realize the calling God
put on my heart back in February 2012 (just a few months ago)…I got here and
said, “Wow, this is it! …this is where it will all begin.” I’ll be honest, I don’t think I was overly
excited about it; rather I was scared.
Me giving over my life to God didn’t really kick in until I realized it
was time to do His work. Immediately upon that moment of realization
my hands began to sweat, my heart palpitate, and an overall feeling of
uneasiness engulfed me. …I turned to my
brother one evening and said, “Dude…I realized this isn’t a vacation anymore. It’s
like God said, ‘It’s time’…It’s scary though. It’s like this big moment you’re
life has been prepared for that you never saw coming.” …So here I am, living humbly, delved into my
school work and academics daily, continuing to fellowship and build onto my
family in Christ, heavily breaking down the Bible, witnessing (though I’m
working on doing that more)—and preparing for what is next. …All I’m saying to God is, I’m going to be
ready…I’m getting ready for you…God I’m ready.
Prayer:
I want to say thank you to God, for continuing to sanctify me...For continually
pulling back layers of my being, layers of my character, and soul; making me
raw, so that I can more easily uptake the penetration of His wisdom and
guidance. ...God, I just want to say thank you for allowing me to endure what
is needed for the next step and making me whole through You...
